Tuesday, January 27, 2015

First FANTASTIC FOUR Reboot Trailer Is Not Very Fantastic

Well, that was...interesting.

After months of posts on the interwebz from outraged Fantastic Four fans, the first teaser trailer to Josh Trank's Fantastic Four reboot finally dropped to an overall "Meh."  The good news is, the trailer isn't completely horrible and actually has some impressive visuals along with a strong science fiction emphasis.

The bad news is, it's not the Fantastic Four.  At least, not the one Marvel and its fans want.

With the Marvel logo nice and prominent (and oh, how they must love that), sad piano music begins to play and a rumbly Reg E. Cathy asks "How did we get this far?  Human beings have an immeasure desire to discover...to invent...to build.  Our future depends on us furthering these ideals, a responsibility that rests on the shoulders of generations to come."

And at this point, as sad violin music accompanies the sad piano, you start to wonder if you're watching a trailer for the sequel to Christopher Nolan's Interstellar instead.

We see Reed Richards (Miles Teller), apparently fresh out of high school and looking around at what appears to be an impressive research facility.  Susan Storm (Kate Mara) is intently analyzing various global monitoring screens while rocking some Beats by Dre headphones.  Ben Grimm (Jamie Bell) appears to be trying out for high school baseball (note the school bus in the background), while Johnny Storm (Michael B. Jordan) seems to be working on his car inside a garage that looks like my college apartment living room.

"But with every new discovery," continues Voiceover Guy as we see the Four don spacesuits and enter a dimensional travel machine as Susan and Johnny's father Dr. Storm (Reg E. Cathey) looks on with grave concern, "there is risk...there is sacrifice...and there are consequences."

We then see the Four either crawling around slowly on the ground, bursting out from a big rock (Hi, Ben!), venting flame out of his special space-wacey suit (Hi, Johnny!), or stretching his left arm towards something off screen (Hi, Reed!) before the FANT4STIC...errr, Fantastic Four title comes up.

Lastly, we see programmer and blogger (I kid you not) Victor Domashev (Toby Kebbell), lying stretched out on a medical table as Reed looks on.  "Be ready for what's coming," whispers Doctor Doomashev.

"What is coming?" asks Reed.

"The answers," replies Doctor Doomashev as we hear some dramatic nail hammering noises, and see the Fantastic Four (with Ben all nice and rocky as The Thing) looking up at a huge stream of energy shooting upward from a series of stone pillars and ripping open the sky.

Yes, even the Fantastic Four is now dark and gritty.  Thanks, Hollywood.

If you'd like to see the full trailer, you can check it out below thanks to JoBlo.com's official YouTube account...

Fantastic Four is scheduled to arrive in theaters on August 7, 2015.

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